Chevalier had a topic on enhancements, and that prompted me to look for my notes on a related topic: Natural Enjoyment.
Note for Livvy: you might consider this to be one of my pervy or edible items that you seem to take pleasure in reading. So I suggest you make some tea, have some pastries or truffles ready, maybe get some cucumber sandwiches? And comfortably snug up for the read ;-).
If some paragraphs are of a rather explicit nature, I apologies up front. Tender eyes should be averted here or here.
When I meet a Lady for mutual pleasure, I want it to be exactly that:
Mutual and Pleasure.
Therefore, I will go to a certain length to make things comfortable, enjoyable for the Lady. I know it sounds arrogant and hypocritical, but I mean it: A Truly Good Meeting is Enjoyed by Both.
Note: Yes, I know. It is possible that the paid-for-GFE-provider is such a good actress that the paying customer doesn't notice the difference. In that case it is still a Good Meeting, with the client in blissful ignorance. But even then, I suspect the provider (the Artist!) will have the pleasure of seeing her ploy work to perfection. I presume that, as a good Artist, she will get her satisfaction from the fact that her Art is appreciated. I think Sue refers to this in her diary-entry of 26-Jul. In all my meetings with Suzie, I've never noticed any sign of "acting". That woman will always be a delightful and tantalizing misstery.
Back to Topic: Nature is your best guide.
To obtain maximum enjoyment, satisfaction if you like, I prefer a meeting to go naturally. We should follow Nature's lead.
I am not in favor of using excessive alcohol or other stimulants. I'm lucky enough not to need any pills, blue or otherwise, and I like to think I will never use them.
Some nibbles and drinks are called for to break the ice, to facilitate a chat, and to create a cosy-comfy atmosphere, but excesses should be avoided. For drinks, I consider one tasty glass of wine ideal, although I've seen a girl down a bottle in no-time once.
You never bothered with the fine cheeses or the delicious olives, but you spotted the two Large glasses immediately - Cheers lurve - Gulp, Oh my, that IS a very tasty red innit... The rest of the bottle was quickly shared, and a wild and Exciting date followed. You came onto me like a warm tsunami and I nearly suffocated under your sheer energy and our mutual delight. (I think you know who you are lurve - You are delicious. Take well care!).
So what would I consider Natural ? And do others out there have any opinion on this ?
Mainly, I look for guidance to biology. Humans were designed to relate, to fuse, to be together, in specific way. And I think we differ from animals in that humans need a mental connect as well as good physical chemistry.
Following nature's clues here I have decided I will not chase up the Total PSE, but rather I will look for a certain intense form of GFE. For the same reasons, I've decided to not practice CIM or A or WS or other things I consider Extreme or unnatural.
The mental connect is Very Important to me, and I can recommend anyone to go and explore this. I think it is a sine-qua-non for a Good Date.
Humans seem designed to come together and to communicate. The build-up of a "connect", a relation, is essential. This is where a good chat, kissing, cuddling and caressing come into play. I Greatly appreciate and enjoy those foreplay activities.
For the same reason, I avoid parlours and parlour-style short-dates. Parlour work was described by one girl who had tried it as "often close to paid rape".
Acting will sometimes replace the "mental connect". Really good acting can even imitate it, creating a true work of performing art [find link to good topic on Courtesane = Artist], and an eternal mystery for the customer.
I can have Exhausting days, sometimes jetlagged, often plain tired, stressed from another day of avoiding/defusing office-politics by scruffy-suited middle-zombies afraid to loose their perks, their powerbase and most of all their retirement-benefits.
On dates where my meticulous preparations get run-through in a hurry, and when my more-primitive-member does not stand to immediate attention, I am quite happy to just "be with" my chosen companion.
But I do my Research, check this How to Choose post on NEE. And in most cases my chosen partner is understanding and communicative. I find that if I focus on my partner, I will always fall into the mood of: She-is-adorable-and-I-want-to-please-her. (a matter of good research and careful selection - I am bragging here ...). The effect is generally a surprising revival of my primary urge.
This is why a Small number of known regulars are a great source of comfort in times of work-stress or after jetlag. The boost of a good Date is such a Blast
Mental note: re-vist post on "the Bliss of Regulars"
Gentle cuddling, eyecontact, and overall tenderness will cure just about anything. And everything flows automatically from there onwards. If both parties are Hot for Harder action, that will ensue quite naturally.
I do think Kissing should be practiced full-on, but with a new partner that should be approached carefully, gently. Explore how far both of you want to go, and don't insist on immediate tongue-action. Everything should develop gradually, and in total mutual consent.
Normally I am an Ardent and Passionate Kisser, but gentle avoidance on her part, or too much ciggy-smelly will gently redirect my focus to other part of my companion to find mutual pleasure. There are plenty of ways to cuddle and enjoy someone's company, and many ways can lead to mutual bliss.
Cunnilingus, should ideally be practiced by both but only at total discretion of both participants. It has, in my opinion, a function in the build-up and the bonding. Some companions do get genuinely excited from gently receiving, and so do I. But I will not consider doing it "to completion". I tried that just once, with a delicious, cuddly and very skillful Lady, but I found I got a better buzz from a regular, conventional climax. And I suspect most female companions who enjoy spit-or-swallow "in their personal lives" provide this "service" only with a certain reluctance.
And most of all, the digestive system is not the natural environment to dispose a healthy dose of the liquid-of-life.
I prefer to focus on the pleasure of my female partner and to have the satisfaction to see her relax and react, rather then force her to perform an unnatural act on herself or on me just for my own pervy pleasure.
My companion is more then welcome to tell me what she likes, or how she likes things. And I will gladly believe that relaxed Ladies can enjoy multiple climaxes. If I am allowed to help my partner achieve pleasure, that gives me a Great Buzz.
If she wants to bring a Rabbit she is more then welcome. As long as I'm allowed to come close, to cuddle up, to participate, to share in some gentle way.
To see a beautiful companion go to Heaven and gently come down again can be very rewarding.
Bondage stuff, or T+T, can undoubtedly be exciting, although would take a lot of confidence for me to be tied to a bed. I have not done that yet.
But Gentle Teasing can be another great part of the foreplay. Both give and take.
And I love to try and bring a relaxed partner to the edge and then keep her waiting, asking for relief, just a little longer, a little closer, another gentle little lick..
Likewise, I enjoy tantric-style postponement myself. However, I've been known to loose control many times. Some of my companions were Very Skilled and loved to show it by gently but irreversibly taking control of my excitement. That is probably the Natural way of things.
Our genes have the urge to multiply, after all. And each individual would search to gain some control over that process. Her power over me is complete when she has me at her mercy and she can make me loose control at her command.
I will try and postpone my own climax for as long as I possibly can. But I also know that I will give in at some point.
Ideally, the Final Fusion happens together, in a relaxed, natural position that both parties can enjoy. I have no specific preference for Mish, Cowgirl, Doggy, or more exotic and acrobatic positions although I like to see her face. Many positions can lead to hugely satisfactory climaxes.
The best Finales are enjoyed together, and with intimacy in the most natural way (Always Protected!). Sometimes, I'm just clinging on to her for deer life. I can have my face buried deep in her neck or in her bosom, hugging her as close as I can, craving a much physical contact as I can possibly get in this lonely existence. But on most occasions, I will try to Surrender to Absolute Bliss while looking at her beautiful face, straight into her eyes if she will let me, trying to establish the closes possible mental contact while the uncontrollable physical excitement overwhelms us.
As one Lady who calls a spade a space once stated:
gosh, you didn't just want to fuck my body, you wanted to fuck my brain as well.
Crude, but very well put.
In my quest for physical, mental and spiritual experiences, my leading theme will remain: follow Nature's call. Do the natural things. So far, it has worked very well for me, and I find it does lead to some very satisfying moments.
Opinions or suggestions anyone ?
Footnote for Livvy: was it pervy enough ? was it Edible ?